Together We Paint Our Lives

**Building a Life Through the Wall between us**

We are building a life with a wall between us.

Not a wall made of fear or doubt—but an invisible one that feels more like protection than punishment. It stands quietly between Chicago and Los Angeles, between two time zones and two separate days, holding space for what is still becoming.

Until the moment we can stand on the same side of it, we are creating a storyline. We are painting our lives together from a distance—each brushstroke intentional, each color chosen with care. Today, my canvas sits in Chicago. His is stretched out in Los Angeles. Yet somehow, the picture keeps aligning.

From the beginning to the end, we see the same future: a blended family learning one another’s rhythms, laughter layered over healing, and eventually welcoming our first child together in Los Angeles. The planning alone is unlike anything I imagined—building a family while apart, the speaking of our dreams out loud instead of touching them, trusting timing instead of control.

If I tried to explain our relationship plainly, it might sound fragmented. But it isn’t broken—it’s a puzzle. Every piece we place, every conversation, every sacrifice pulls us closer, not farther apart.

There is disappointment here. A deep one. The ache of knowing my husband may not be physically present in the room when our child is born is a grief I don’t ignore. Life, circumstances, and unseen forces have complicated what should be simple.

But there is also certainty.

I know he will make sure I am cared for—emotionally, physically and completely—through pregnancy and through the birth. Presence is not only measured by proximity; sometimes it is proven through devotion when distance exists.

While we paint our lives together, I choose to see the light outweighing the shadow. Even in contrast—black and white, struggle and hope—this season of waiting has given me the man I dreamed of my entire life.

And for now, that is enough to keep painting.

Because every plan, every page, is part of a life in progress.